We Go

Home.  Our home.  What an interesting thought this is!  It is true that our home exists within the boundaries of our little family.  I feel home when I am around my husband and my son.  However, it is a constant reality for us that our home has not been found yet.  We have lived in a couple different places and all felt so temporary.  We did not have a chance to relax, put our feet up, decorate for goodness sake!

I could say as a woman this is hard because I want to make a home.  I could say this is hard for my husband because he wants to provide a home.  All these are true, but honestly, it's the rest we crave.  The ability to feel at home because we have rest there.  I want to snuggle up and not feel the constant presence of others.  I want to take out the garbage on my own schedule.  I want to have people over and for them to enter the atmosphere I desire for them.  I do not want to worry.

This is hard, but not joyless.  It is hard like the last moments before your best friend arrives when you haven't seen her in ages.  It's waiting when you know you will not have to wait for much longer.  I feel this way.  I feel the promise in the struggle.

To feel at home with God means to rest.  It means taking a deep breath of fresh air, putting your feet up or taking a stroll and enjoy God.  When I enjoy God, I can create a home wherever we go.